Entry 27: Read November 1

November 30

I had to think for a few days about the disaster that turned out to be Thanksgiving. And in those days I still haven't taken it all in. To describe in one word.

WOW.

I didn't expect it to be a walk in the park, but wow. It all started off so easy. Kim insisted on cooking all by herself. Mom picked up Alex Wednesday night so they were here right at 3. Dad and Sally got here a little later. Mike had helped me clean and decorate with leaves and those little tiny pumpkins. Mom and Sally made awkward small talk. The storm was brewing slowly. But it was Kim who I believe started it. First I asked about 3:30 how it was coming along and was shooed out of the kitchen. Then my mom poked her head in and was kicked out. And Sally, poor stupid babytalking Sally, asked loudly about 4:30 if we were eating soon. It was at this point Kim realized she wasn't quite as Martha as she may have imagined. First we heard something clattering into the sink and then the sobbing and swearing. And then Sally, poor stupid babytalking Sally, went into the kitchen where the dragon who used to be Kim was. I can't quote her exact words but I believe it went something like, "Get out of my fucking Kitchen Babytalker! Out! Ouuuuuuuut!" Followed by lots of crying sobbing shuffling noises and more stuff crashing in the sink. Sally came back a bit pale. I don't know that you're ever ready for a six foot tall blonde to scream and throw things.

We all sat there for a minute not saying anything and just looking at each other. Finally Alex and I went slowly into the dragon's lair. Barbie had finally cracked under the pressure of all those years of pretending to be perfect. And dinner? It was all done. Don't know what brought her to crazyland but dinner was all ready to go! I nodded at Alex and he started bringing it out to the chain of clth covered card tables we'd set up in the living room. I knelt down to Kim and began to take off her apron.

"They didn't come" she whispered in tears. "Who?" "No one." She was right. I don't know who she had invited but the only people in the living room belonged to me. She went into her room and for a minute I felt sad for her. May parents are divorced and all but they're a part of my life. Hers just send postcards from whatever foreign country they jet off to. But then she came out of her room in a new outfit and all made up and lavished all the attention being thrown at her and I stopped feeling bad for her.

The most terrible moment is when you realize your best friend is a faker. I wasted so many years telling her my secrets and caring about her life and wasting my love on her.

What happened next is still a little unbelieveable to me. I don't know where it all came from. Well I do, but, well maybe I haven't finished figuring it all out. Maybe, just WOW will have to do for right now. I'm tired of thinking right now and I don't feel like writing anymore.

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