Entry 20: Read October 23

October 4

I survived another wedding. I have become a walking cliche as all my college friends and the few from high school get married. I really do have a lot of great friends but have decided I can never get married. Who would be my bridesmaids? I've been in five weddings and I'll bet there's some rule about having to ask the people who have asked you.

The difference about being a bridesmaid this time around was that for once I wasn't the single one who needed to be set up with the out of town cousin! Which really is pretty rude. I don't think any single person wants to be pointed out and displayed. And since all married people were once single people it never made sense to me. Why not having a boyfriend meant someone could set you up with their dentist.

Anyway I'm sure everyone was relieved to find out that I'm back in the game or whatever.

It's funny being the bridesmaid when you know all your sorority sisters expected to have already come to your wedding. I think everyone just assumed since we'd dated all through college that we'd end up married or something. Guess I'm glad he never asked because I probably would have said yes and that wouldn't have made either of us happy.

Five years is a long time to spend with somebody and it's only been a year and a half or so we've been apart. I can't believe how much different I am. I guess part of it's Mike but a lot of it's me. I got so used to being with Justin that I didn't know how to be without Justin. I don't want to be like that again. So I'm not gonna.

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